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40 Dang Weeks

*BIGGEST SIGH EVER* guess I'll be pregnant forever. But really, it wont be more than a week because I'll probably be induced if I go a week over my due date. I think I don't want to be induced just because I want to have the experience of natural labor beginning. I have anticipated it so much that in a way it would feel like a let down to just have it scheduled.

Ah, either way it will be a blessing to have a healthy babe. I don't think there has been any other instance in my life that is such a big deal, but I have had no idea WHEN it's going to happen.  In the evenings, I really feel like something is going on. Each day the feels get a little more intense: constant tightness, occasional sharp pains in various places, an overwhelming feeling of heaviness in my belly. Some moments in the evenings have even taken my breath, but as soon as I lay down to go to sleep, they go away. In the morning and early afternoon I don't even feel tight. Its so weird, and frustrating.

I am completely out of things to do at work. I get excited when I get an email, because it is a chance for a task. We have had to push back my leave, which I did not think I would have to do. I have mostly been passing the work days with very occasional quick 5 minute projects, walks, and eating.

I don't feel too bad, but it's like all the fun parts of being pregnant are over. Kicks are no longer cute and fun, just uncomfortable. I am no longer cute either, just big and surly. Trying to keep everything maintained so all is ready for hospital time is becoming exhausting for both Tim and me! I keep having to pack and unpack things. We are doing all the housework every night so the house is spotless when we go to bed... just in case! Every day when I leave work I shut everything down and put everything away, and then it is that much more depressing when I return the next day and have to fire everything back up.

BAH I'm going crazy!



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